Life does not stop after divorce, it begins anew!
Sorry, but this writing is not about the 1982 song by the Clash, “Should I Stay or Should I Go?” - though it is a question many have asked themselves in relationships and marriages time and time again. It is one of those questions that has more variables than can be found in algebra.
I often find myself talking with other women, no matter where I may be – grocery store lines, airports, doctors’ offices, etc. about personal subjects: marriage in particular. I think women like talking to virtual strangers since it gives them a measure of anonymity and the ability to talk frankly about what they are going through without any judgement.
Let’s face it: our friends and family do not want to hear any more about the litany of checks in your head as to why you should stay or leave your marriage, nor does the one contemplating leaving want to hear opinions from others since they are biased. We all truly want to come to life changing decisions on our own, for after all, no one know what goes on in our homes and hearts as well as we do.
When I was miserably married, I talked to strangers as well, but mostly I scoured the Internet for a “how-to-know” guide to know if my leaving the marriage was the right thing to do. I searched for self-help books for signs, for a list of some kind to TELL me whether I was valid in my thought process, for me and my children. I never found that answer I had been searching for, however I did find it within, but it took a very long time.
The one thing I do know is that we only have one go around in this life, no matter what your religious belief is: this particular life is the only that matters right now. Even if you believe in reincarnation, do you really want to live this life miserably? Going through each and every day as though you cannot wait for it to end?
Believe me, if you do feel this way, I know exactly how you feel. I was right there for a long time, until one day I had an epiphany. It was really so simple: I have a right to be happy! It was that simple! But it took me a longtime to get there.
The question as to whether to stay or not however, looms large for many. Even if you believe you have an inherent right to be happy, how do you know it’s the right decision to leave? One day you feel positive that you are going to leave, and the next day you feel stuck in the mud.
Since I know those exact feelings, I have written an e-book: To Stay or Not to Stay: How to Know When it’s Time to Leave Your Marriage? It is available for purchase on Amazon for Kindle here. By writing this e-book, it was intention to assist others in their quest to find that answer from within, that answer that only they know.
Ii includes marital and divorce statistics, information about children and divorce, words from other women on how they knew it was time to go, and much more. If any readers are interested in participating on how they knew they had to leave, I would love to hear from you. You will of course remain anonymous.
Let me just say, that by no means is this an anti-marriage book. I still believe in marriage, heck I just became happily engaged, and I have an abundance of faith that it can be, and is for many, a fully satisfying coupling of two people who love each other above all others. Keep in mind that each day we are given on this planet is a gift! It is a present that requires your full presence. No matter your circumstance, you can turn it around.
Wishing you love and peace! I would love to hear from you!! Xoxo
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Has been writing most of her adult life on various topics important to women and children. If you are contemplating divorce, then you should check out her e-book.