Life does not stop after divorce, it begins anew!
Throughout most of my adult life I have kept a journal. My journal knows my long-held desires, dreams, and secrets. My journal holds fast to the promise that I will not be exposed unless of course someone comes along and reads it. My journal has kept me sane!
During the best and worst of times, before and after divorce, I have written my heart out and it has truly helped me. During my marriage I wrote often and it was a life saver of sorts since it helped me re-trace events, see negative patterns in the relationship, and help me realize I had to get out.
Many people treat journaling as something they think they ought do, but rarely take the time to implement it. But, keeping a journal has many positive benefits.
It can help with your own personal growth and development, since you have the ability to look back and gain insight into your moods and behaviors over time.
It helps with stress-reduction and problem-solving since there are times we do not know what is going on within us, and only through the passage of time do we see our way through it.
Writing can do wonders for your health. Beyond keeping your creative juices flowing, regular writing can give you a safe, cathartic release valve for the stresses of your daily life. Not only does regular writing make you feel good, it helps you re-live the events you experienced in a safe environment where you can process them without fear or stress.
Writing in a journal is effective in the healing process as well, whether it’s a relationship or grief. Oftentimes we hold our emotions in and when we write our thoughts down it helps to free our mind of the clutter. Reading back entries has helped me reflect on where I was and see how far I have grown.
Writing about the ups and downs of your daily life can help you gain perspective on your experiences and find lessons in them. Keeping a journal is a constant and clear way to remind yourself that YOU are the author of your own life story.
The simple act of writing a few words, sentences, or paragraphs everyday can have a profound and instant effect on your life for the better. Journaling can change your life and make you more interested and interesting through the years. You do not have to be a “writer” to keep a journal, but you do have to be totally honest if it is going to actually help you. Write without abandon. As you get more practice at it you will hopefully write freely without any encumbrances or worry of someone reading it.
Here are a few tips to help you get started:
--I personally love the feeling of physically writing down my thoughts in a journal notebook. When you are writing your innermost thoughts, putting pen to paper is the most natural way of doing so. I think it is more hack proof as well, as long as you hide it well or keep it with you.
--You can start with a simple, short bio of your life as to where you are now, your relationships, family, work, etc. Are you where you want to be? Are you happy? Are there things about your life you want to change?
--Another great way to start writing is in a “stream of consciousness.” Write for a few minutes your thoughts or feelings of the moment, or pick an issue you are dealing with. Remember to write without editing or censoring your thoughts.
--You can write about events or ideas that have impacted you.
--You can write about the goals you have. Not the daily to-do list, but long-term goals and dreams for your future. This is a beneficial tool to help you review your goals and objectives and to see if you are on the right path to achieving them.
--Write about the moments of joy you have. The little hugs from your children or spouse, the little surprise someone did for you out of the blue or the fabulous vacation you went on. These joyful moments can be forgotten about when you are in turmoil, so it is a great way to document your life.
--Another beneficial writing tool is to write about, or keep in the back of your journal a list of things and people you appreciate. It helps in cultivating an attitude of gratitude and it a great daily read to give you a boost of appreciation for all you do have. When we focus on what we love about our life we help to receive more of the positive in our life.
The benefits of journaling are different for each of us, but for all of us it does serve as a document of our life. Trust me, while you may think that you’ll be able to remember everything just as clearly in the future, you won’t. Remember when you were a kid and you thought your experiences would be easily recalled at age 30? Now what do you remember from those days besides a fight you may have had with a classmate?
As each year passes, the images of our memories burn out and the fog sets in. By age 80, you’ll only remember the faintest outlines of the big things that happened to you. But the stuff that’s really interesting is often the little, seemingly mundane details of life that we always want to remember.
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